This question I ask myself often, for while I am great at being faithful and loyal, I tend to get in the way of my own self in a relationship. I can write the best advice ever, I can be that ear for friends to vent to while giving them positive relationship advice, but when it comes to me taking my own words of wisdom to heart? They get lost in translation. Seriously.
What is realistic love? To me realistic love is something that you feel that is stemmed from a deeper than the surface feeling. Realistic love is one that is embedded within your soul, a future that you foresee as a whole with another person. Common goals, common interests, imperfections that you both acknowledge but accept, because love is so deeply embedded within your soul the only other comparable love is that of your flesh and blood, parental love.
To me realistic love, having a positive relationship, is one in which you can step back from your own emotional roller coaster. We all have demons inside that sprout up from time to time, sometimes those demons can get the best of us. A scenario that happens with your loved one can trigger these demons in ways that are toxic to your positive relationship. The only advice I have to you about your inner demons is to work through them, have a loving partner who can understand and empathize for those demons but also work with you to get you beyond that moment of feeling uneasy.
All that I know about realistic love and living a positive lifestyle within a relationship is that sometimes the wording in which we say things can be taken completely off base, sometimes the meaning behind our words that are sent in text message can be taken to heart and feel offensive. I say to this scenario that you work with your partner to always speak when having a challenging time, while spoken word doesn’t come easy to me; it is something I wish to work on. I want so badly to be able to vocalize my feelings and communicate with my man in a way that helps us grow together. I also want him to be able to learn how I hear his words, so that he can learn the best way to say things to me as well.