I Won’t Let Them Suffer for Any of my Insecurities #motherhood

It was that time of day, my 9am to 11am shift at Moms.com was over, it was a sunny, warm Thursday morning and the boys had been so patient, entertaining themselves while I worked for two hours within the same room as them. I knew I had to do something, but we have been to the family pool nearly every day this Summer, I didn’t want to pack up and drive over to Vermont, I wanted something different today. The boys deserved to go out and have fun, because four week days this Summer they will have to endure me working 9am to 11am, they deserve to have the remainder of the day all about them. I work from home to make memories, so what kind of memories could be made on this fine day?

Overcoming my Own Insecurities to be the Best Mom and Woman for My Kids

In all reality, I really didn’t want to go out in public, I ran out of waxing strips awhile back so my eyebrows are growing in and my upper lip is certainly ready for a waxing. I wanted to stay home, sit in front of the fan and just veg out, but that is not what my son’s would enjoy. Summer break is about them, it’s about having the best few months ever during their break from school. At least, that is how I feel.

I needed to just suck it up, get on my bathing suit and shorts with a tank top, ignore my bloated belly and over sized breasts. I needed to just think about the type of person I am, not what the shell of my outer body says to others. By the way, who gives a crap what others judge my body image to be from; I always say it’s from having kids, Winter time and lack of my exercise routine. I eat pretty decently, and I stopped working out; but really? It’s not my place to explain to another human being why I look the way I look. I am me. I am happy and the type of person I am is the type of person I want my children to grow up to be; what I look like is irrelevant.

Overcoming my Own Insecurities to be the Best Mom and Woman for My Kids

I hate that my breasts are huge, they are huge because I fed my children though. I can’t complain for having large breasts because they grew from a C cup to an H cup because I fed my children. I lost a lot of weight at first from breastfeeding and I shouldn’t have to hide my top heavy body because people can’t handle seeing cleavage. I do not wear outfits like above, except when I am at the beach, but I do like v-neck shirts that are appropriate outside of the beach area. This is me in my bathing suit, one in which you wouldn’t usually catch me in, but this year, I decided to make a change. I decided to change my mindset…. I will be okay with my body. The wide hips, the lack of a bum, the large top heavy breasts, my large biceps, my upper lip not waxed right now, the eyebrows not perfectly waxed and the freckles that cover nearly all of my body …

I am embracing every bit of myself, because if I do not do that, how can anyone else? Also, how can my children learn to embrace their unique individual traits if not by their parents example? I expect the parents to be the role model, so while I can’t look in the mirror and totally LOVE my body image, I can do a few things; accept myself for who I am and focus on the love of my personality, accept my body as is or work out, excercise and go hiking with the kids to teach them that my body weight does matter health wise, but beyond that? My body weight will not keep me down. I will enjoy Summer break with the kids, and I will do so with my head held high, a skip in my step and a huge smile upon my face, because

I am making this the best Summer ever, and one in which will set the standard high for all future Summers.


Shopping for Bras is Difficult

I seriously have issues finding the Best bra possible for me which is why all too often I speak of having a breast reduction. Lately I have been purchasing my bras online because it’s just so much easier than heading to store that sells my bra size because usually that store is more than 45 minutes away from me.

As a person who has had three children I have the curves and all of the fun body angles, as I like to call them, that run in my family more so after you have given birth to children. It’s so difficult to remember that you are an adult now and to fall in love with your imperfections of that “had a baby” body image some woman find themselves in these days.

Seamless shape wear seems to be a good product that I have started looking into because after attending the conference I went to in June I realized many woman wear products to help keep that shape they want underneath their clothing.

Love all of the products they have these days to help woman feel better and look better to stand up more confident in their skin!

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What Makes a Woman Hot?

I am the mother of a girl, which means I spend time thinking about how my daughter is perceiving woman to be “hot” aka attractive to other people. I do not mean in the man interest way for her, but just in general. A couple of years ago my daughter stated to me that she is too big, that her friend is so small and tiny. My daughter is starting to realize that not every girl or woman is created “equal”.

I have curves, I have hips and I have learned to love my body over the years and my personality usually catches people before any body image does {ok so I lied, my chest catches peoples attention fast}. You see all of the models in magazines are usually skinny, covered in make up and dressed to kill. They are HOT, seriously, but are they “real”? I say no, they may be real people with great personalities but their body images that are shown all over the most popular magazines are not that of a normal every day average female.

What is average female? According to all the research I have done it seems the average female in the United States comes in at about 162.9 lbs and wears a size 14. I weigh 210lbs and where a size 15/16 depending upon the brand {yes that weight and size in all pics within this blog post}. So my weight isn’t “average” but I am also top heavy and have more muscle in my legs and arms than fat which I think accounts for my weight seeming high.

Obviously I could lose some weight or tone up my tummy a bit more to get my BMI to a healthier level and be feeling a bit more “fit” but I am confident in who I am today! This confident attitude I try to push onto my daughter because she isn’t a pole, she has meat on her bones, but she is gorgeous. I think she has the best eyes and sweetest smile. The girl is a giver and cares deeply for anyone who walks into her life, or even another kid in class who she may not know. My daughter is a kind hearted little girl and I so wish the media would stop pushing the idea that skinny is IN down our throats, because I don’t know how a skinny, no meat on their bones body is healthy? I would assume not enough fat would be just as bad for your body as being over weight is.

So I ask you all today, what makes a woman HOT? Also, how do you push those media images out of your child’s mind to keep their self esteem moving up?

P.S. I swore I wouldn’t share my weight number online until I lost all the weight, but alas it goes with the territory of me trying to prove the point that age is just a number and so is the weight on a scale!

It Is What We Perceive It To Be

Definition of PerceiveI was thinking the other day about perceptions, and it’s so true that life is what we perceive it to be. This holds true for any area of your life. Think about it, if you perceive your body image as that of a fat, no good person then you will feel like a fat, no good person. Reality is you need to look at every area of your life and perceive it to be a positive place. Yes you may not be totally happy with your body image, yes your life may appear to be in a rough place right now. So many people are getting laid off and losing their income. Prices of everything around us go up as our income drops or stays the same, this is the life we all live at the moment.

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