Children are incredible little people. While all children have their own personality, how they are parented will determine their confidence level.
Shyness in Young Children
This is a common thing. Some children will be more clingy to a parent and be reluctant to go to an adult they are unfamiliar with. Parents who force the child to go to the arms of another adult frighten the child and sends the message that there is something wrong with them.
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Instead, tell the person that your child needs a little time to warm up to them. Encourage the person to play with a toy near the child. This tells the child that they are okay and safe. The same applies to play groups. Tell the children, that your child will play with them in a while when he gets used to the.
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We realize that these people are our peers. They are trying to get down the same rocky road that we are, with as few bruises as possible. This is the glue that binds us. We begin to experience friendship, team support, and unity. We begin to understand that each of us has weaknesses. Standing alone, they are evident. But as part of a team, our strengths propel us forward. As our fear dissipates, we realize we have found our place. We want to be here, and we thrive.
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Many parents feel that dance is a perfect activity for children. It allows the child to build a peer group. We have already mentioned why that is important. But, there are other ways dance can be used by a child as building blocks to a stronger self-confidence level.
When a child enters a beginner dance class, everyone is clumsy. Everyone has to learn the terms that the instructor uses, and no matter how hard they try, it is going to take practice to master a move. Beginner dance class teaches a child to be okay when they are not okay. They do not judge others harshly, and they do not judge themselves harshly.
Eventually, they will learn enough steps to have a recital. They will be dressed in fabulous Alexandra Costumes, and they will be beside themselves with happiness. Every parent is going to give them huge applause. They will feel a great sense of accomplishment.
Why this Matters
This is planting a seed of confidence in your child. This seed will grow every time you tell them they do well at anything. When you tell them they did a good job cleaning their room, or you say it was really nice of them to share with their friend, it grows. With a healthy self-confidence, they are not afraid to try. They are also not afraid to fail. They are balanced. They understand some people are talented in sports; others are talented in art. But the only way to know is to try them both.
Other Tips for Keeping Your Confidence Up
- Teach your children to pay attention to the way they feel when they eat certain foods. This will help you teach them how to use food to fuel their activities.
- Keep them hydrated. A dehydrated child will not feel or perform well.
- Compliment their progress, not their “step”. This teaches them that all effort is valuable.
- Do not allow them to let the team down. Unless they are ill, they must learn to fulfill their commitment.
What Not to Do
- Do not embarrass your child if they fail at something.
- Do not degrade them or force them to try again and again until they get it right.
- Let the instructor be the instructor. Don’t try to do their job.
- Do not threaten them with not being allowed to go dancing as a punishment. When a person joins a team, the team depends on them. Don’t teach your child to be someone who doesn’t respect others.
- Don’t call them names. Telling a child they are clumsy, nerdy, or they have “two left feet” hurts them.
Most parents want their child to succeed. They will succeed at some things, and they may not succeed at other things. No body is perfect. Don’t set the bar so high that your child no longer has fun. If you want a child that is self-confident, ambitious and a person of good core values, you must help them by building that person. Just don’t forget, they are children. Give them time; they will get there.
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