How to Communicate Effectively with Teens

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NH Mama loving life. Co-Author (w/ my daughter) of Positive Girl - The Power of Your Thoughts. Fueled by coffee, great convos & optimistic thoughts! Brandy Ellen, Virtual Assistant is a work-from-home entrepreneur. Question about this post or something found within it? Read my Disclosure Policy as well as Terms of Use.

18 thoughts on “How to Communicate Effectively with Teens”

  1. Such Great Tips I Can Really Use With My Girls Love The Don’t Over Lecture LOL This Is So True I Need To Try NOT To Do This Thank You!!

  2. Ugh I was just talking about this with a few of my girlfriends. You made some good points,thank you for sharing.

    1. Thank you. I am a year into this, still a learning experience for me and I know each household and family is different for sure. These are just some tips that have helped to maintain a bond during these trying times.

  3. I don’t have teens of my own, but I teach high school. So I am around teens all the time. I agree with much of this from my experience.

  4. It’s an interesting perspective you’ve written here. I sometimes wonder if this has to do with geography. The way kids are raised where I come from is very different than how they’re raised where I live now. I have stepdaughters; 19, 16 and 10 and I’d say that yeah, they don’t want lectures but the parental alarms shouldn’t be shut off. If you cannot teach your teen life lessons, they’ll learn them somewhere else. I’d prefer it come from their father, mom or me. 🙂

    1. I think what has worked for me, as a parent, and I am still new to this teen gig (only a year into it). Is to be open minded, hear her out. Not lecture in that moment. I take time to hear her out, ask her thoughts, opinions, etc and get a feel for where she is at. Since I feel confident that she ultimately replies with her own right determination based on the questions I may ask or what not (you see my teen is first born and well beyond her years so maybe because of that, our conversations and parenting is a bit more unique) or I could be wrong. I just have noticed if I immediately start to lecture, parent during her rant, she will just stop talking. IF I choose to listen, feel out what her thoughts are on it, then either commend her in that moment for the right decisions OR bring the subject up in a different light when she’s calmer about it; that works much better as the parent in my scenario anyways. 🙂 I totally agree I would much rather have my teen learn from her parents than their peers – those peers are something else these days 🙁

  5. Great advice! My oldest hits teendom in September. I sometimes remind myself how I was as a teen/preteen and remember it could be worse… so far not so bad!

    1. That’s certainly something I think of often – it could be worse. I was so much worse than she is now .. that’s for sure!

  6. Looking back I feel very sorry for my parents – I was an awful teen! These sound like some great tips to help. x

    1. I hear you! I wasn’t too bad, but looking at how my teen is – I am thankful she has yet to seem interested in what I had done back at her age. Thank goodness!

  7. Great advice. I am ending the teen years with my three. I would definitely agree with don’t lecture. As soon as they sense a lecture, they turn you off.

    1. I am only in year one of having a teen. It’s been like “where is my little girl?!” She’s great, in all reality just the hormones are tough to deal with. Luckily she’s a girl and I am a girl, so I understand the hormones in women thing!

  8. great tips. this is what i really think often on how to lecture them but i think you got it all right. 🙂

  9. I have two that are passed those teen years but in a few more years I’ll be going through this with my youngest son. Great advice!

  10. I can certainly identify with not encouraging drama. My daughter isn’t even a teen yet and she can get dramatic. If I respond in a dramatic way, it can get even worse. But if I answer in a calm, encouraging way she usually calms down.

  11. I have never had children and can’t imagine trying to bring them up in this day and age. I know if I did have teens, I’d be needing lots of advice like this.

  12. Agreed with the drama part as well. We are going through this righ tnow with my 13yr old daughter. With her softball team and at school Double drama

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