As it nears the end of Summer I find myself in a gloomy mood. I feel sad, just want to sleep and it’s been hard to keep those happy thoughts coming. One thing I am here for is to help spread cheer and happiness. I am not here to say life is perfect and I never feel sad because if I pretended that I am always happy or that I am never depressed then I would be lying to you and that my friends is not my intentions. I wish to be open, honest and approachable by all.
I want to give you a peek into what I have been feeling lately and what I plan to do to create happiness from this situation! I am an optimistic thinker, and hope that giving you a look into my end of Summer blues will open up your mind to creative ideas to increase your happiness.
First things first, I am not having end of Summer blues because my oldest is going back to school, nor am I having them because my youngest is turning one this week. I am simply not taking the time for ME, all Summer I spent raising the kids, taking care of their needs and my husband’s needs. I never took time out for ME. Not taking time out for yourself is bad, it will create a depression that is hard to get out of unless you think happy thoughts and act on those thoughts.
I am also one to try to talk things out, and so after talking and talking (and talking some more) with my husband we finally decided that what’s going on is that I need some time for me. I personally feel bad telling my husband when he gets home from a long days work that I am heading out the door for no reason, maybe just to go read a book on the park bench or to drive aimlessly because I need to get out of the house. I don’t know about you, but I felt that he deserved to get away too. I felt that I owed him something and that he deserved to be able to do whatever he wants because he works a full time job up to 6 days a week.
All too often I am found making my responsibilities of raising the kids, running this blog and my business as “not a big deal”. I always act like hubby’s job is way more important than mine and he deserves a break more than me, after all I am simply playing with the kids all day, right?! WRONG!
Even my husband agrees that regardless of whether I work from home, run my blog or do anything else; raising the children is a full time job in itself. He says this to me but he doesn’t always act that way. I have learned one thing from being married; men don’t know what you want unless you TELL them. This doesn’t go for all men, but most men certainly don’t have the same “emotional” desire to have their “own time” or to get away. I have been trying to express to hubby how I feel because I fear if I don’t open up and get some time to ME then our marriage will suffer and it quite honestly is already suffering because I am in dire need of time to be ME.
Luckily my husband is understanding and he has told me I don’t need a reason to leave, I don’t need to have a destination, if this is what I need to help me smile again, then by all means go do it! And so I will be venturing out into the big world for time to myself. Maybe I will be able to finish reading The Problem with Women… is Men: The Evolution of a Man’s Man to a Man of Higher Consciousness. No matter what I do while I am out away from my husband and the kids I know it will feel great to miss them, truly MISS THEM, because honestly I haven’t been away from my boys in longer than I can remember. It will be nice to have a chance to miss my children so I can come back and be the Mommy I love to be!