As part of Mama’s Losin’ It writers workshop I bring you this post. The prompt I chose was;
“Write about how you felt when you discovered you were lied to.”
I am going to bring up a very old situation that occurred when my husband and I were first dating. He lied to me, oh yes, he did. He actually didn’t just “lie” but he pretended he was waking up from my house at 6am to go to work when he was actually going to his apartment, where he sat around all day just to call me “after work” even though … HE DID NOT HAVE A JOB ANYMORE?! Oh yes….so knowing that here is how I felt…
Finding out you have been lied to, at least for me, is like stabbing me with a knife while ripping my heart out of my chest. It hurts so bad yet makes me so angry at the same time, that I don’t know what to do.
When I found out my husband {boyfriend at the time} was lying to me about his occupational situation, or lack there of, my first feeling was ANGER. I was so mad at him, so much so that I did not dare call him right away. I wanted to drive right over to his apartment and punch him in the face – yes I was angry.
After I calmed down and really thought about how I was going to react to this deceitful situation, I felt confused. I was confused as to why a person who seemed so sincerely serious about me, would lie about something as silly as a “job”. The confusion was the hardest part, aside from trying to understand his side of the reasoning in his head. Confusion sucks, because you just don’t know what to do. You do not understand. I am a very smart person and being confused is rough on me. I am also a person who has to analyze everything – so YES being confused was harder on me than just plain being angry!
After the feeling of anger and confusion subsided, I felt a strong feeling for “the need for answers”. I called my husband {then boyfriend} and cried while asking him to explain just why he felt the need to lie to me.
After I had the explanation, which to this day I still don’t agree with and that was about 3 years ago, I felt lost. I understood his side but felt lost for about a week afterwards and uncertain of my feelings towards him.
To this day I will sometimes wonder, can I love a man who could so boldly lie to my face?
Makes you think!
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I guess you wonder if they could lie about something petty, they’ll lie about something big for sure. Hopefully not, in your case!
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