Raising my kids has always been a challenge, strike that, raising my sons has always been a challenge. I was blessed with my first born being so easy going and adaptable; honestly I think being a single mom a majority of her young years in addition to her having four years with just Mama assisted in her being a little easier than having two boys two years and six days apart. You see, the boys have been shared from the day the youngest was two years old and that probably could cause it to be a different upbringing of children. Whatever the reasons, each day I learn something new.
I remember getting about zero sleep, okay maybe four hours tops each night as my first born son was not a good sleeper. Finally around age 5 or 6 he started sleeping better and even to this day he takes melatonin to fall asleep, or else his brain will just continue going. Once that son started sleeping well, the other son decided it was his turn to start having sleep issues. My youngest has always been a light sleeper, but he was a good sleeper, now he also takes melatonin because the only way he crashes without that is if he’s been awake at 4am for a few days and so sleep deprived that his body shuts down. The youngest son is always so full of energy; it’s hard to keep up some days.
My first born is now heading into teen years and while she swears that isn’t going to change anything, I know in my heart it will. Even now, she is not turning 13 until October, I see a change I her moods and the struggles that come when you start to get older with more emotions. It is a difficult age that will bring on more challenges and learning curves for me as a parent. Thankfully our family is very affectionate and I have enforced a 20 second hug whenever she is being moody or sad. It may sound silly, but the 20 second hug has really assisted in turning a downward mood upwards! I just grab ahold of her, gently but firmly, and hug while counting out loud to 20… and the smile appears. Sure the one hug doesn’t change her immediately, but it is a start of an upwards spiral of happiness.
My middle child has autism, he is high functioning autistic, but most don’t realize that because his spectrum level seems to be more involved in the social area of autism. You won’t catch my son being outwardly open with you, unless he forms a bond. I think of his autism and wonder if maybe it is just that the boys are raised to not be so open with strangers, but to have a strong sense of human beings, their energy and knowing when it is okay to open up to someone else. We are all very blessed to be able to read people and feel their positive, or negative, energy as that is how I raised them. When out in public my sons are not as outspoken because they take time to feel trust in another person, while some say that isn’t okay, I think it is good to be cautious with strangers.
Now that I am done with my ramblings, written one early Saturday in June, as I watch my trio slowly start to wake up after our family slumber party Friday night, I am going to go sip my coffee and watch as the trio wakes up and gives me Mama hugs. I love that each wakes up giving me a big ole Mama hug.
May you have many blessings in the life of parenthood and learn every day from your children…
My girls just had a slumber party last night. Our solution was to put them outside in a tent. Let the neighbors hear them all night!
I think it’s good that your children want to feel people out before opening up to them. Trust is meant to be earned and not everyone can be trusted anymore.
I’m always learning from my children. That’s really great that they’re wanting to take the time to feel trust in someone. I think that’s very important to get to know someone before you can fully trust them.
Your kids sound like a fun crew!! I know my mom hated the teenage years and how much things changed hopefully its not to bad for you guys.
They Sound like a fun bunch of kids. I think each child as there own comfort zone and should never be pushed to far. Thank you for sharing.