I think about parenting all day and all night, this has become a huge part of my life since I earned the title Mom. I honestly can say parenthood is the most important part of my life, a close second importance is my work. There are many ways to raise your child, every book and every other parent will lend you advice on what worked for them. The key is that those methods worked for them. The advice you receive, the suggestions others lend, are not made of gold and are not something you have to follow. Kindly accept advice and knowledge shared from one parent to another, but never question your ultimate way of living if it works for you and your children.
One thing about co-parenting or even parenting as husband and wife under the same roof is that not even both parents will have the same approach to every parenting scenario. Mom and Dad do things different, this is just a fact of life. Mom and Dad have a different approach to life, so why wouldn’t they have a different approach in parenthood? Makes sense that they would approach things differently, even in regards to their own children.
What is extremely important as two parents raising children together, is that both are on the same goal path. This means that Mom and Dad both have the same goals in mind with the type of child they want to raise into adulthood. It’s best that you have discussions beforehand about your wishes for your not-yet-planned child, but sometimes that doesn’t happen. Life seems to go on whether you are ready for it or not.
The best tips I have for you in regards to ensuring you both have the same goals for your children is to do the following:
- Discuss what is important to both of you and collide them together in your child’s upbringing.
- Be sure you both are on the same path to instill the same morals and personality traits in your child.
- Be respectful that your approach and their approach may be different.
- Keep open communication to ensure that you both are indeed still working to parent on the same path.
It’s really irrelevant if your spouse handles your child differently than you do, what really matters most is that you both are working to raise the same type of child. This is important. Everything else is just fluff, and honestly a child who has two parents who approach things differently will assist that child in having more of an open mind to life as they get older.
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This post hits home in our house. My husband and I could NOT be any more different than we are, including in how we approach the kids. But we make it work. This is definitely something that should be approached before people get married and have kids though… food for thought. It’s hard sometimes, especially when it’s a value system that differs (between me and hubby in regards to the kids).