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NH Mama loving life. Co-Author (w/ my daughter) of Positive Girl - The Power of Your Thoughts. Fueled by coffee, great convos & optimistic thoughts! Brandy Ellen, Virtual Assistant is a work from home entrepreneur. Question about this post or something found within it? Read my Disclosure Policy as well as Terms of Use.

3 thoughts on “Do Not Ignore Red Flags When Dating”

  1. You have some great tips, but I am happy to say I am married and don’t have to go through the dating thing….

  2. I agree that whether or not you are using an online service or not, DO NOT IGNORE THOSE FLAGS. I’ve seen a gal I care about tons get hooked up with a man who told her then-five or six year old son to shut up. Red flag. Ignored, overlooked, whatever… There were other signs but that was in the beg. when he should have been bending over backwards to be nice. She co-habited with him for five or six years and left him because he was unreasonably mean towards anything related to her child (who by then was very close to being a teen). Things were even further complicated by the fact they had a child of their own in the meantime. It gets more complicated and convoluted, but it all could have been avoided if she’d have found someone more worthy of having her and her family from the get-go. Not every man is a family man, and getting into a serious relationship is not a way to change that…

    I think too that you should trust any red flags that go up when you get comfortable enough with a person you have met online, to introduce them to your kids (if there are kids involved). Don’t ignore the signs that are telling you the date and the kids are not a good fit. I think we get so wrapped up in our shared values with the other person that we can lose sight of the whole picture sometimes. And then that’s not good for anyone because that lovey-dovey forever anything you want stage does wear off. We have an unwritten contract to love and protect our kids at any cost. It’s easier to do when you’re married and all living with dad, but when other people step in…it becomes a lot harder and we have to remember that unwritten contract.

    I’m quite done ranting now…I’ve just seen several little lives torn apart where that really didn’t need to happen and it really, really gets to me. Careful who you’re dating fellas and ladies, and remember if you there are children involved, dating takes on a bigger scope than just ‘you and me.’

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