Do Parents Give Themselves a Harder Time Than Necessary?

Parenthood brings joy like no other and sadness like no other. I firmly believe parenthood is a method to test our sanity, and if we come out on top after raising children with a brain that still works, a smile upon our face and children that survived to become well rounded adults – that we mastered it. It’s the path along the way that gets use shook up.

Pain is only Thoughts

I blamed myself for my son Aj having issues. After all, I wasn’t prepared to be a mom for a second time when I found out I was pregnant. I didn’t want to have another baby just yet, my life was simple as a mom of one and I enjoyed having my daughter getting to that fun age of doing more. I wasn’t ready. When Aj was born, I only nursed him for 8 weeks because he was a big eater and I had a little girl to raise as well as this new baby, so bottle feeding formula was the way I went after 8 weeks of breast feeding. Aj wasn’t ever really snuggled a lot as a baby, he wasn’t kissed, hugged and shown affection in the way my first born and last born child was during those baby years. I always wondered if maybe that was partially why Aj has been struggling with moods and other symptoms. I had to have a counselor tell me multiple times that I need to stop blaming myself, what’s going on with my son is not something I did or did not do. It’s how his brain is wired, that’s out of my control.

As a parent, I sometimes raise my voice unnecessarily. It’s sometimes raised to get the kids attention because they have run a muck for far too long and I need to get them to hear me above their own chatter, then other times it’s simply because I am overtired and happen to yell instead of talk at a normal decibel to them. I hate doing that. I watch as Aj goes into full blown tears, Aj doesn’t like loud noises from anyone or anything – it puts him into frustrated mode or tearful mode. When that happens, I blame myself for making the mistake of yelling and handling a situation poorly.

I look back at all of these mistakes I make here and there in parenthood and I realize something…

Every single parent in the whole wide world has these moments, those moments when you do something and hang onto the fact that you wish you hadn’t. Parents seem to hang onto these little mistakes we make while our children happily go along with their world, easily forgiving you before you have forgiven yourself.

Kids are resilient, they truly are. I love how sweet, kind and innocent kids are. Kids are simple. It’s easy, you say sorry, you mean sorry and you do better next time – your kids know you will try to do better next time. Our kids seem to have more faith in us as parents than we sometimes have in our own selves. So the next time you want to sit and sulk, and be upset with yourself for handling a situation wrong, as it pertains to parenthood, remember that your kids are fine. The kids have moved on from that scenario and so should you!

Try to cut yourself some slack, we all make mistakes and yes, we sometimes make the same ones twice as it pertains to parenthood, but one thing is for sure YOUR KIDS THINK YOU ROCK THE PARENTING THING so go on and prove them right.

Stress Can Ruin A Body

I don’t think I have ever really been so stressed that my body reacted from the level of worry and stress I was under. Although I am overall a positive person who tries her hardest to remain calm and focus on positive energy I am human and things to pile up on me sometimes. That is what happened on Monday, my mind got put on overload with some issues and more sleep issues on top of that.

I woke up to find my stomach was feeling all stretched and uncomfortable and my mind was foggy. I could barely do a thing, all I wanted to do was sleep. Well later that day I started my monthly non-friend as I call it and it was not scheduled to arrive this week since it had ever so kindly visited me last week.

I did have a female appointment scheduled with Planned Parenthood but had to cancel it due to having a non-friend visit yet again for the second time in a month. I spoke with my friends and I have been told that stress can make your body do this … have a second menstrual cycle in the same month. I am annoyed but hey it’s life!

Finally I am back on track and as soon as my non-friend stops visiting I will be happier and try harder to keep from stressing and worrying over situations to avoid having my body react in such a negative way.

Have you ever been so stressed or so worried that your body reacted in a funky way? Please say I am not alone!

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