Divorce Could Create Financial Hardships … at First

Everyone has bad days, even months, but nothing hits you harder than a life event, such as divorce, that leaves you financially jaw dropped. Divorce happens very often these days, so it’s a life event that many can relate to, I’m sure. I was divorced in 2010, with that came a change in household income. I was no longer the work from home Mom who added income to the household’s main form of income; I was it. I became the sole financial supplier in the home. It was very difficult to get used to managing money that I had coming in net 30, 60 and sometimes 120 days to feed and support my three children. It took me quite some time to find tools and resources that would assist me in successfully working from home while raising my three children and keeping food on the table as well as a […]

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How to Make a Valid Decision and Follow Through

Many are faced with decisions to make every day, whether it be what to purchase for groceries, what items your children need or much bigger decisions such as divorce, we all have decisions to make on a daily basis. I decided that I would make an easy to follow list of how you can make a valid decision and follow through. Because you know, I am like so good at that myself. {if you are sensing sarcasm, you are correct} While I may not be great at following my own advice, and really, who is? I am very great at lending advice that if followed through with makes perfect sense and actually works out as a benefit to your life as you know it! Come along with me, amuse me if you will. Read on … Yes. No Maybe. We live in a world full of non-committal responses and actions. […]

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You Need to Separate From your Son

Prior to the diagnosis of Autism this past week, we met with Aj’s counselor. I say Aj’s counselor but really he helps my ex husband and I to move forward with Aj and occasionally he does play a game to interact with Aj, overall he is more there to ensure we are keeping up with the parenting techniques that work for Aj. While I will tell you that I would highly recommend Aj’s counselor, I was left feeling jaw dropped at an appointment we had about a month ago. Here’s what happened… On this particular visit the emotional connection between Aj and I was very prevalent in the room. The counselor noticed it, my ex husband noticed it and of course I noticed it. Aj was having a rough time this visit and needed to have a time out, a time out with Aj usually means to-be-restrained, because usually he […]

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My Plain and Simple View on What Co-Parenting Is

Co-parenting to me is what I refer to when two parents are no longer residing in the same household, they have separated, divorced or just broke up having never been married, but they have children who bind them forever. That is co-parenting. Two parents who have children who bind them forever. Plain -n- Simple. I tend to look at co-parenting in very simple terms because after all, I have already been through 11 years of co-parenting my daughter and now about a couple years or so of co-parenting my boys. My ex husband and I resided in same household off and on after our divorce, but we aren’t here to talk about that. So I have co-parenting for a lot of years and have already had the experiences that occur when one is attempting to share a child, remember a child is a human being, your child does not belong […]

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{Personal Story of the Past} I was That Little Girl #divorce #parents #abuse

Divorce or separation hits everyone differently. This goes with death and birth. Each human being, whether grown adult or child, responds to life’s challenges quite differently. Being unique is what sets us apart from each other, yet also makes us work together very well. The story I wish to share today is from my memory banks of many moons ago. A young girl, around age 12, was found with two parents being divorced. While this young girl could totally see that her parents were better off apart due to a multitude of reasons, she still missed her Dad terribly. This little girl was used to having her Dad be the “fun parent” and here she was with her Mother who wasn’t known as the fun parent. You see, when you are 12, the fun parent is the one who gets all the credit and love, it’s just how life for […]

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“This Love is Forever” a Book for Children of Divorce Giveaway and Review

A mother and daughter teamed up to write a positive book about divorce, it’s difficult for children of all ages to experience divorce. I, myself, was a product of divorce having gone through that with my parents around age 12. I recall being okay with my parents being apart because I knew for many reasons they could no longer be married, the signs of their love falling apart were very evident to my sister and I, but it was still difficult to swallow not having my father around every day as he was the previous years of my life. I went from seeing my Dad every day to seeing him every other weekend as most children do. Then there are children like mine who have two parents who work around schedules to help keep a connection and visitation going through out the weeks, it’s difficult to know what type of […]

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A New Chapter in my Life

My children have two different Dad’s, my first born and only daughter has one father that I was never married to and have not been in a relationship with since she was about 4 months old {she is now almost 11 years old}. Then my two sons who are now 4 and 6 were with my ex husband, we divorced in May of 2010 { I believe}  but lived together off and on among trying to make things work for our sons many a times until we finally realized enough was enough and it wasn’t something you can force to work. My ex husband and I co-parent great together, I consider him a great friend and he is a fantastic Daddy to our sons. Never though, have I met someone since being married then divorced from my son’s father that I would dream of moving onto a new chapter in […]

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This Could Be The Hardest Part of Co-Parenting

The challenges that arise with co-parenting are plentiful, you see when you raise your children in a home where both parents reside then the fact that each parent is slightly or completely different can be balanced for the most part. Having a balanced household between Mom and Dad working together is amazing but when you take those same two parents, separate them and place children in the middle, all heck could break loose. It’s sometimes difficult for parents to step back and let the other parent do their thing without interfering, even in a household where two parents reside which means that is even more difficult when you realize you no longer have control over the rules placed in the other household while your children visit their other parent. It can take a long time to adjust to both letting go of the fact that you have no control over […]

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Was Marriage More Eternal To Those Who Waited?

I often wonder if marriage lasted longer with those who waited to have sexual relations until after they were wed? Who knows exactly what it is that keeps two people together in a marriage while the other couple is siting in divorce court ready to point fingers, lay blame and argue their way through an ugly divorce that ends up hurting all involved, including themselves. I recently found an article shared by a friend on a Facebook titled You never Marry the Right Person and I just had to read this. I am always intrigued by people’s opinions on marriage, because after all I often wonder about my own decision to marry and then later on to get divorced. I still live with the hope that my family will get this thing figured out and we will continue on being strong together as a united family, but it’s difficult to […]

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Moms: It’s Ok to Refresh

A lot of moms feel guilty about taking time off for themselves or asking a family member or friend to watch their kid(s) for a night while they take a much-needed rest. It’s perfectly fine to have a little “you time” here and there, or even to take out-of-town trips. The Perfect Weekend Getaway I traveled to Chicago recently for work but decided to stay an extra few days just to relax and spend some time alone. I’m a single mom and I own my own small business as a licensed personal trainer, so I often feel a little run down after a couple of long weeks of work. My son was staying with my mom, so I decided to check out the Chicago Convention & Tourism Bureau while I was downtown for my event to see what else was going on. I felt a little guilty at first for […]

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Arnold Schwarzenegger “Survived” Maria

Arnold Schwarzenegger decided to pull a pretty unkind move about three days ago when he was spotted wearing an “I survived Maria” t-shirt. TMZ reports that Arnold actually got this shirt last November during a farewell party for the Governor’s staff. The shirts were designed by Maria’s staff as a joke. Arnold apparently found humor in wearing this shirt and crossing out the 2007 to replace it with 1977 the year that Arnold and Maria started dating. This seems to be a pretty unkind move on Arnold’s part, after all he is the one who fathered a child with their maid. If Arnold was trying to make an attempt at a joke, this was by far not a funny thing to do. Wearing this shirt in public was an act to show just how arrogant this man must truly be.   How about you focus on your children Arnold, not […]

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I Get it, Support your Marriage but at what cost?

I am divorced, fully disclosing this fact. I feel we tried and tried and tried but divorce was the end result. As much as I have this yearning to keep my family together, I also know when I am not at my best that my children are not at their best. I am a huge supporter of marriage and think that when you take those vows you are not stuck to them, but you are committed to ensure you take every possible measure to seek help and work on communication to see if the issues that arise can be resolved. I know from personal experience that just raising children can cause a strain on any marriage, even the best marriages but a strain on marriage doesn’t mean it has to be the end of a marriage. My sons take up a lot of parental time and since they rarely sleep […]

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