Is Infertility Clinic Right for You?

If you are unable to get pregnant, you are not alone. According to a report released by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), about 10.9 percent of American women, or 6.7 million women, aged 15 to 44 have trouble getting or staying pregnant. If you have a strong desire to have a child, infertility can have serious psychological and emotional consequences, and it can undermine your ability to live a normal life. While there is no sure way to reverse infertility, there are a number of things that you can do to increase your chances of getting pregnant, and one of them is to visit an infertility clinic.

Understanding Infertility

Infertility is clinically defined as the inability to get pregnant after attempting for one year. Women who manage to get pregnant but are unable to stay pregnant may also be regarded as infertile. Pregnancy results from a process that involves a number of steps. First of all, an egg must be released from a woman’s ovaries. Then, the egg has to travel to the womb through a fallopian tube, and it must be joined with and fertilized by a man’s sperm along the way. Finally, the fertilized egg has to be attached to the inside of the womb. Infertility can occur if any of these steps fail.

Infertility does not always result from a woman’s problem; it can also be caused by a certain problem in a man. There are a number of factors that can increase the risk of infertility, and these include age, smoking, excessive alcohol use, drugs, stress, poor diet, health problems, medicines and others. An increasing number of American women are trying to get pregnant in their 30s or 40s, and about one out of three couples in which the woman is older than 35 experience fertility problems.

When Should Women with Fertility Problems Start Calling Their Doctors?

Most medical experts advise women to try to get pregnant for at least one year before consulting their doctors. Women aged 35 and above should visit their doctors after they have tried for six months. A woman’s chances of conceiving can be significantly reduced every year after she reaches 30. Women are advised to talk to their doctors before they try to get pregnant.

The Benefits of Visiting an Infertility Clinic

An infertility clinic provides specialized services for people who have difficulty getting pregnant. It can help you find out the causes of your fertility problems and provide the necessary treatment and support to improve your chances of conceiving. The services offered can vary significantly from one clinic to another, but some of the services that are typically available at an infertility clinic include fertility testing, diagnosis of fertility problems, infertility counseling and infertility treatments such as ovulation induction, in vitro fertilization and surgical fertility procedures.

If you are planning to visit an infertility clinic, it is advisable that you choose one that has a high success rate. Click here to learn how to choose the right infertility clinic.

5 Tips to Raising Positive Thinkers

Raising children is no piece of cake, each day you are forced to adapt to a new challenge. I firmly believe my two sons, specifically, were put on this planet to lighten me up and keep me on my toes. Little do my boys realize, I have zero balance on my toes. It’s a constant juggling act around here to keep things steady. The easiest way for me to explain my parenting techniques is to share with you my personal favorite 5 Tips to Raising Positive Thinkers. These are tried and true techniques that worked for me, but let it be known, these are techniques I have done since DAY ONE. If you are just coming into this and trying it for the first time, understand it won’t be something that works in a couple of days; keep on it Mama and Daddy, things do get better!

5 Tips to Raising Positive Children

ONE - The ever so obvious first step is to lead by example; start living your life in the positive. Bills have you hanging your head low? Kids stressing you out? Learn to find that happy place, the one thing you can do for just one minute that will allow you to breath and come back swinging with a smile! For me, it’s music. Each night I decompress in the kitchen while cooking dinner and doing dishes over music, Pandora app is the chosen musical player and the genre depends on what type of day I had.

TWO – Never underestimate the power of your words; if you want your children to be positive thinkers, then you must learn to be a positive thinker. Homework a challenge? Kids ready to run and toss that homework in the trash? Total meltdown central? Allow your children, through your example, to step back from their homework. Provide your children a way to evaluate their own reasons for a meltdown, think about it, know the emotion they feel and work towards a solution that will allow them to complete what they have to in a way that is less stressful. This teaches your child to use their mind and words to solve an emotional problem with a positive outlook.

THREE – One can never have too many hugs; a simple hug as often as possible through out your child’s day never hurt anyone. A 20 second hug has also been shown to release the happy hormones in every one; whether a child or adult. So take time to hug more often because that is one way to show love and affection to your child with minimal effort. A 20 second hug can do far more to teach your children to be positive thinkers than any words you speak. Remember, actions speak louder than words, correct?!

FOUR – Teach your child how to brainstorm; we live in a very technologically driven world, social media makes it so that we don’t have to use our brains as often, please do not underestimate the power of teaching your child to use their mind. A great way to teach your child to be a positive thinker is to teach them pros versus cons lists, written with a pencil and a piece of paper. You know that old school; make a column with pros on one side and cons on the other to help you  make a valid decision based on your scenario. This old school method will teach your child to focus on the pros vs cons and in turn will allow them to eventually realize more often than not the pros aka the positives of a situation may be more beneficial than the cons aka the negative.

FIVE -  Use your words effectively; your kids have you all stressed out, ready to scream! You want so badly just to run away because your “what I can handle” meter has reached a near overload. This is okay, it happens to the best of us. We are human, remember? It is how you handle that meter about to explode that can teach your child to be positive or negative. Knowing who we are as an individual can benefit your child in so many ways, learn to use your words, learn that it is okay to tell your child that you are at your limit and need a moment to go breath. This teaches your child to use their words when feeling overwhelmed with negativity and to be able to think wisely about the words they say next. Time can make a difference in the words we use.

Well there you have it, my five tips, of course I am sure you may have some more and I would love to hear them. Please leave one comment below with a tip of positive parenting that will enable children to be positive thinkers, I will be happy to hear your tips & suggestions!

Remember, it takes a village to raise a child!

 

Spanking Your Child Doesn’t Teach any Lessons

Let’s start this post off by saying that I am not telling you how to discipline your own children, I am simply writing this as another view on why spanking doesn’t teach any lessons and therefore shouldn’t be a form of punishment for a naughty child.

Why Spaking Doesn't Teach Lessons

To spank or not to spank your child. That is the question. I think this is something parents discuss far before their children are even born; how will we discipline our child?! With so many techniques out there in today’s world, it’s no wonder parents are found with a hefty choice to make. Do we spank and do old school punishment styles that both you and I probably grew up with? Do we embrace a newer, more accepted approach of discipline such as the time out?

Decisions. Decisions.

I am guilty of having spanked my children from time to time. It’s happened. I admit it. I have found though, that it never works as a means to teach any lesson. Spanking far too often is done in a moment of high frustration and ends up being something a parent can do harder than necessary. This borders into child abuse. Hence why so many push that spanking should not be a form of discipline. I have more of an acceptable simple opinion to cite regarding the decision to spank or not to spank.

Hear me out.

Does spanking as a means of discipline teach any lessons? I for one feel that my job as a parent is to teach my children right from wrong. As a parent, it’s my job to teach consequences for actions. As a parent, it’s my job to teach my children to find a way to learn from mistakes or naughty behavior. As a parent, it’s my job to teach children to think about their actions. Does spanking a child teach any 0f those vitally important life lessons? I say not.

Why I think the time out for discipline is the best option out there:

  • Children are learning, so making mistakes and being naughty, as us adults like to call it, are all a part of children attempting to learn boundaries, self constraint and what’s acceptable behavior or not.
  • Providing a place in your home for a time out, where the child sits alone for one-minute-per-age, allows your child the time to calm down from whatever situation just occurred. Calming down is the 1st step.
  • A time out when enforced consistently with the one-minute-per-age technique will allow your child to think about their actions and feel sorry for that or allow them to realize when they are naughty they won’t take part in “life as they know it” for a specific time frame.
  • Placing a child in a time out, citing why they are being placed in the time out, and walking away to allow them alone time in a spot designated for time out sessions; shows your child how to handle frustrations. As a parent, you may be frustrated, if you use the time out, it teaches children to take time to breath, think and come back to the “real world”.

Teaching children life lessons such as; taking time to calm when upset, thinking about your actions, knowing that the real world doesn’t accept mean behavior, learning boundaries and being taught that the adult is the boss no matter what or simply teaching them to use their words when in high frustration mode, are all such important lessons you, the parent, should be teaching.

Spanking, to me, only teaches our children that they will get beat if they don’t follow rules, if they test boundaries, if they make a mistake. I firmly feel that spanking will teach a child to handle frustrations, mistakes of others, etc etc with violence. I firmly believe a time out teaches children to use their words, think about actions and take time to breath when frustrations are high.

Those are all life lessons I would much prefer teaching our future leaders, wouldn’t you?


“Image courtesy of Stuart Miles / FreeDigitalPhotos.net”.

My Juggling Act – Making Time for All Children

I have three children, for some that seems like a lot to keep up with while others have far more children than me and see it as less of a challenge. Having children, no matter how many can always lead to a juggling act. Some are juggling work, family and home while others juggle home and family only. Whatever you are juggling, we all know as parents that a 12 hour day doesn’t ever seem long enough. I am here to share with you what I do to ensure I make time for each of my children, specifically  my youngest, as well as share a few tips on how I make it all work!

How to Make Time for Each Child

With my  middle child being different than my other two, having a previous mood disorder & anxiety diagnosis but awaiting an autism evaluation, you can imagine my hands are full. It’s often difficult to realize I haven’t paid one ounce of positive attention to my other two children because Aj had me so preoccupied tending to his needs. Due to Aj needing so much of my attention, energy and strength I have to be very conscious of paying positive attention to my other two children; why? Because it’s important that my other two children know I do love them just as much as Aj and that they are just as important. It’s also important to pay positive attention to my other two children because I don’t want them to start to have bitter feelings towards myself as a Mom who may not pay them enough attention nor having those feelings about their special needs brother. It’s not Aj’s fault he requires more attention and time from me, it’s no one’s fault.

How To Juggling Your Kids

For my youngest it’s easy to spend positive attention time with him because he is pretty simple. At age 5 the most important thing you can do for K-man is to pay attention to what interests him. K-man doesn’t really care if you are truly interacting but he does care that you are physically and mentally there in the moment playing cars, Legos or blocks with him. Our most recent time together involved him setting up his many vehicles in his room and me attempting to make a race track for him. We had a blast and it only required about 15 minutes of my time before dinner. That’s another good point; the amount of minutes per child doesn’t seem to have mattered to my children. Just a simple 15 minute time allotted for each child to have your undivided attention makes for the difference between a child acting out to get any form of attention versus a child who can have patience knowing they will get the positive attention at some point that day.

Making Time for All Children is Important

I must admit spending a minimum of 15 minutes positively interacting with each of my children really changes their moods. My K-man tends to enjoy any attention he can get and if you are not giving him enough positive attention, he will seek out the negative attention. Aj is more simple, he doesn’t seem to feel the need for a lot of one on one time but I am working on getting him to be more interactive at a comfortable-for-him level. My oldest and only daughter tends to drift off the grid a bit when her brothers are requiring more time from me, but I do ensure that my daughter and I get a Mom/Daughter day every so often and I also make sure to spend 15 minutes minimum with her at end of day after her brothers are asleep. This has helped us build a bond stronger than a herd of elephants.

Four Tips on How to Ensure your Children Get Positive Parent Time

  • Know Your Children – Out of everyone in the whole world you should be the one person who knows what makes your children happy.  If they enjoy Legos, play Legos. If they enjoy chatting about their life, listen to them chat. If they want to read books, pretend play or so on, do that with them. Ensure you are engaging in one on one time that is based on an activity your child loves to do.
  • Realize It’s Quality not Quantity That Counts -  Spend a minimum of 15 minutes each day with one on one time. The magic number I have found that works best is a minimum of 15 minutes each day per child. Be sure to set a timer so that when it beeps they know their time is up. Also be sure to set aside your cell phone and give your child your 100% undivided attention. Kids know when you are not “really there”.
  • Remind Your Children to Respect Their Sibling’s One on One Time – Be sure to get your other children engaged together or individually with something that will allot you the 15 minutes with their sibling. Remind each child that they too will get your undivided attention on their turn. This teaches the skills of manners, family bonding, and taking turns.
  • Get in Touch with Your Inner Child – During these one on one time sessions remember, while you are this child’s parent, that this particular time with your child is all about having fun, being silly and connecting with them on their level. Have fun with it, be silly and creative, should I dare say be goofy?! It’s suppose to be fun one on one time, make sure that it is!

There you have it, a few ways I have ensured that I am raising my children to be happy and healthy. I hope these tips will assist you in gaining more positive one on one time with your children which will increase the bond you two have from now to forever.

Do Parents Give Themselves a Harder Time Than Necessary?

Parenthood brings joy like no other and sadness like no other. I firmly believe parenthood is a method to test our sanity, and if we come out on top after raising children with a brain that still works, a smile upon our face and children that survived to become well rounded adults – that we mastered it. It’s the path along the way that gets use shook up.

Pain is only Thoughts

I blamed myself for my son Aj having issues. After all, I wasn’t prepared to be a mom for a second time when I found out I was pregnant. I didn’t want to have another baby just yet, my life was simple as a mom of one and I enjoyed having my daughter getting to that fun age of doing more. I wasn’t ready. When Aj was born, I only nursed him for 8 weeks because he was a big eater and I had a little girl to raise as well as this new baby, so bottle feeding formula was the way I went after 8 weeks of breast feeding. Aj wasn’t ever really snuggled a lot as a baby, he wasn’t kissed, hugged and shown affection in the way my first born and last born child was during those baby years. I always wondered if maybe that was partially why Aj has been struggling with moods and other symptoms. I had to have a counselor tell me multiple times that I need to stop blaming myself, what’s going on with my son is not something I did or did not do. It’s how his brain is wired, that’s out of my control.

As a parent, I sometimes raise my voice unnecessarily. It’s sometimes raised to get the kids attention because they have run a muck for far too long and I need to get them to hear me above their own chatter, then other times it’s simply because I am overtired and happen to yell instead of talk at a normal decibel to them. I hate doing that. I watch as Aj goes into full blown tears, Aj doesn’t like loud noises from anyone or anything – it puts him into frustrated mode or tearful mode. When that happens, I blame myself for making the mistake of yelling and handling a situation poorly.

I look back at all of these mistakes I make here and there in parenthood and I realize something…

Every single parent in the whole wide world has these moments, those moments when you do something and hang onto the fact that you wish you hadn’t. Parents seem to hang onto these little mistakes we make while our children happily go along with their world, easily forgiving you before you have forgiven yourself.

Kids are resilient, they truly are. I love how sweet, kind and innocent kids are. Kids are simple. It’s easy, you say sorry, you mean sorry and you do better next time – your kids know you will try to do better next time. Our kids seem to have more faith in us as parents than we sometimes have in our own selves. So the next time you want to sit and sulk, and be upset with yourself for handling a situation wrong, as it pertains to parenthood, remember that your kids are fine. The kids have moved on from that scenario and so should you!

Try to cut yourself some slack, we all make mistakes and yes, we sometimes make the same ones twice as it pertains to parenthood, but one thing is for sure YOUR KIDS THINK YOU ROCK THE PARENTING THING so go on and prove them right.

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