Many parents are out there planning things for the kids to do for their Mom this Mother’s Day as I sit here on my kid-free weekend for Mother’s Day thinking about why I don’t mind having a kid-free Mother’s Day.
Each week day I wake up, usually after sleeping through my alarm, to make sure my kids have eaten breakfast, gotten dressed and have their bags packed for school. I then make two trips out of the house within an hour of each other to ensure each set of children get to their particular school on time. I then return home to get my work done; ghostwriting, freelance blog posts, PR contacts and paid opportunity replies among still marketing myself to new prospects. After that I shut off my brain from work mode to Mama mode as I return to pick up children at their schools within half an hour of each other.
Meanwhile I am making sure to bring a little something to perk up my teen daughter, because middle school just sucks. I try my best to bring her water or a special drink along with some chocolate for her after school treat, because chocolate fixes anything. I get the boys from their school and listen as they vent about their day and discuss what happened in school. After that there are homework duties, dinner duties, making school lunch duties and the bedtime routine to end their day.
I then return to work mode to complete client work, my own blog work and pitch myself out to more people to ensure work continues in. While my first born goes to her Dad’s house two nights a week in addition to every other weekend, my sons are with me two weeks straight during the school year and when Summer comes they spend two week DAYS with their Dad as he returns them to me before he has to go this second shift job, that’s in addition to the same every other weekend as their Sister.
Life is a little bit of happy chaos, I am constantly on the run and juggling multiple duties so when Mother’s Day happens to fall upon a co-parenting weekend where the kids are with their Dads? I am okay with that. I deserve a two day break from the duties of motherhood and I am happy to have that break. Being okay with this two day break and being kid-free on Mother’s Day weekend doesn’t make me a bad Mama; it actually makes me a better Mama for when my kids return to me I will be renewed and rejuvenated to jump back into motherhood as if it were day one of this motherhood gig.
I am forever thankful for positive co-parenting and the ability to teach my kids that absence truly makes the heart grow fonder, with each day they are at their Dad’s being happy and enjoying all that Dad’s offer a child; they are able to miss their Mama and I am able to miss them which solidifies our bond as mother and child. I wouldn’t trade a thing in my life for what someone else says is the best life ever and today I am okay with having a kid-free Mother’s Day weekend for a break from motherhood is just the perfect present any parent can receive.
My boys dad and I are divorced and I am in full support of co-parenting – when it works of course. I am lucky that I have a really good relationship with my ex and we are on the same page as far as the kids go.
I think co-parenting – the genuine kind, not the kind where you only snipe each other when the kids aren’t around – is so beneficial for the kids and the parents. Why hold on to bad feelings?
I love this post so much! It was so brave. So many of us are afraid to admit that we’d like a little time away from our kids from time to time.
I couldn’t agree more. Your schedule sounds a lot like mine. I head to 3 schools (or bus stops) each morning with my 4 kiddos. It’s hectic day in and day out. A day alone is ok..even if it is mother’s day. 🙂 Kudos to you for not feeling guilty at all. I spent the morning with hubby and the afternoon/eve with the kids.
I am in desperate need of a totally kid free day (and I have an amazing husband that does more than his fair share) There is nothing wrong with needing and taking a break!
I am so glad you have such a supportive husband, I currently have a boyfriend who I have been with about 9 months now, who has proven to be someone I can foresee a long term future with as he does a lot in this relationship – especially coming into my world of having three kids while he has no kids. It is great to have a loving, supportive partner but a break is always a great way to maintain our own individuality for sure! Cheers to you for having an amazing husband!
I can understand being okay with a kid free Mother’s Day. I think all moms need a day to themselves sometimes. You sound like you are doing a great job of positive co-parenting. I know that would be hard for me.
Co-parenting has its ups and downs, pros and cons just like everything in life. I have been co-parenting my first born since she was about 4 mos old, she is now almost 14 so I like to think I am a pro at this gig 😉 While co-parenting isn’t the path I had envisioned, my ex-husband and I are great friends still and put our sons first … the first born’s dad and I don’t have the same relationship but we do our best and besides our daughter is almost 14 so now it’s more about making sure to listen to her needs and opinions more than the parents having to work as hard. I am glad you left me a comment, have a fabulous day!
It’s nice to have time that is kid free sometimes. We all need to take time for ourselves now and then.
Very true, time to be one with our own minds. To remember who we are and to work towards keeping ourselves fulfilled. I hope you get alone time as often as you need! Thanks for leaving a comment. xo
I can definitely understand this. It’s nice to have some time on your own when you’re usually busy.
Time off from the busy chaos of life certainly is a welcomed moment!
Wow, you work very hard for your children.
I think you deserve a little R&R from them at least every now and then.
All parents work hard, it’s a tough job for sure! Thanks for stopping by to leave a comment, I wish you a happy day today!
Co-parenting is awesome, I wish my ex was ever interested in co-parenting my oldest… He doesn’t though, so he’s with me 24/7….. I think you definitely deserve some kid-free time!
Co-Parenting is not easy for anyone and it saddens me when one of the parents simply walks away forever. It isn’t fair to the child you both created, while I have issues with my first born’ father – we never really see eye to eye, we have done our best to raise her and now, she is about to turn 14 so it’s more about her feelings and opinions than ours as parents being different. I am sending you a virtual hug and strength as you work to raise your child, he will see you as the strong woman you are when he is grown and appreciate all you do for him, I am sure of it!
Who are you telling.. I prefer it! That’s my day and I want to rest.
Co-parenting can be a struggle for some parents. It is so important to try to make it work. The kids benefit from having both parents on the same page.
I would have a hard time with the mom guilt there. But glad you can find your own happiness on Mother’s Day
Being mom is not always easy, yes we should have kid free but in my situation, it doesn’t happen lol. But I’m so thankful to have a family time in last Mother’s Day.