Who is this Brandy Ellen Anyways?!
It's been a while since I have written something about who I am and all…
Dinner was done Pajamas were on. Books were read. Boys were tucked in and Jenny the pug was placed on Aj’s bed. All was completed as normal. K-man was fast asleep. Then it happened…
Aj started having his issues that he has every so often, since he has been off of medication these occurrences are few and far between, but they still happen. Aj is a unique child with a bit of bipolar, anxiety, autistic spectrum symptoms and more all mixed into this compassionate, loving 7 year old boy. I am not sure what is the cause of my son Aj being more sensitive to energies of others, specifically mine, but I am the same way. The energy or aura that surrounds people is something I am extremely sensitive to and this is something that Aj struggles with. Being that I am 32 years old, I am better able to work with this sensitivity but a 7 year old cannot yet learn to cherish and work with such a power.
I used this sensitivity to benefit Aj the other night when he found himself, yet again, fixated on the idea that his belly hurt. Aj was very fidgety and slightly whiny over the fact that, within minutes of being tucked in, he was convinced his belly hurt. While most kids are honest when their belly hurts, it’s something for a parent to be concerned about, it’s not the case 99% of the time with my son Aj. Usually his “stomach aches” are more so to do with the fact that his mind is racing and anxiety for whatever reason has consumed his thoughts, thus bringing on a belly ache. Being that Aj fixates on things, a sudden belly ache doesn’t allow his mind to relax to sleep, instead it creates a whole bowl of stress for him and me.
I started to feel really frustrated as this was the second night in a row he was “pulling this stunt”, but I have an open mind, patient soul and loving nature so I knew there had to be a way to work with Aj to ensure he didn’t end up having to sleep on a make shift bed on my bedroom floor. I had to walk away.
I let Aj know I would be back in a few but do not be loud because I don’t want him to wake up his brother who was fast asleep on the top bunk.
After taking a moment to step away, Aj had some self control and didn’t go totally loud, but rather kept tossing and turning and whining about his belly ache while pouting. During my time that I walked away, I thought long and hard, I focused on clearning my mental clutter and freeing my own mind of any stress related topics. I essentially cleared my brain to a blank slate. I then returned to Aj’s bedside. I knelt down beside his bed with my head on his pillow and used my calm voice to relax Aj in an attempt to get his mind focused on sleep rather than the anxiety induced belly ache. Within moments Aj actually said I could lay on his bed next to him, this is something that never happens, as he has sensory issues with touch and doesn’t like people “in his space” when he is trying to sleep.
With a blank slate mind and nothing but calm, peaceful thoughts in my mind, I laid next to Aj and placed my arm just on him. Aj was laying on his side facing away from me and since he doesn’t like the weight of my arm on his body, again sensory stuff, I laid my feather light arm on his side as a way to help submit some of my calming energy to my son. Aj and I have always had this unique connection, he is the only one out of my three that really thrives on my energy, whatever energy I am giving off in my aura he feels and it affects him. Hence why I say my son is sensitive.
As weird as this may sound to those not as spiritually minded, I literally felt my thoughts transferring my calm energy through my finger tips on this side. I could feel energy being placed to him, slowly he stopped fidgeting, slowly he stopped speaking and finally within only just a few short minutes, he was breathing in his relaxed, fallen asleep state. I don’t care what you all call it, but I think in that moment, right there, I showed that I have a power of energy that I never knew existed, I had the power of using my calm aura to get my anxious son asleep without being stern while still remaining firm that he was to go to sleep and compassion for how he was feeling in that moment. I was able to use my calming energy to calm my son. This moment that happened was so spiritual for me and so magical that I felt this same feeling I had felt the first time I felt the warm sun beaming down on me after I had prayed so hard for God to give me a sign. I feel this was merely just another sign that I have more powers within than I ever realized.