I Get it, Support your Marriage but at what cost?
I am divorced, fully disclosing this fact. I feel we tried and tried and tried…
One day I woke up and my first born was nearing that age of adolescence. No longer was she that sweet little angel of a girl I knew at age 2, she was nearing 10 years old and for the past four years I had noticed changes in her. I knew that she would be starting her hormone changes earlier than I did and that scared me, in more ways than one. Having been very close as mother and daughter, I trusted that my daughter would come to me with anything that she had on her mind. Being that I am a positive, nurturing and loving Mom; I figured that was all that my little girl needed in life.
Boy was I wrong. It wasn’t the positive mindset, the laughter and love that filled that house that keep my daughter and I close. We have some uphill and downhill battles right now during this stage in her life, but we have grown closer through bonding over cards. Yes, that’s right, a deck of 52 cards is what has brought me closer to my daughter. One would never guess the magic behind a good card game after all is silent. Meaning after her brothers are asleep in their beds.
Once the two boys are asleep, my daughter and I head to her bedroom with a Chicken Soup for the Soul book in one hand and a deck of 52 cards in the other. A game called Spit is our choice of card game, but first I read a story from whichever Chicken Soup for the Soul book we are currently working on finishing. As I read the story we both seem to find familiarity within the story, not always do I know why it touches my daughter’s heart, but I can see that it does. With tears being held back and a smile upon her face, I can tell my daughter enjoys Chicken Soup for the Soul as much as I do.
Once a child who loved pictures and smiling, she is now the one who holds back from time time, either embarrassed or not so sure how to talk to me, but when we pull out the deck of 52 cards and our game of Spit starts, it’s the magic behind those cards that brings out the conversations. From boys to school and everywhere in between, my daughter and I share a 15-20 minute time period of simply having me listen to her every word. It’s those moments, during our card game, that I learn more about who my daughter is, what’s important to her at this age and where her heart is in life.
I love our 52 playing cards and I firmly believe there is magic behind a game of cards, having been a child who adored playing Solitaire with her grandfather growing up, I know that I am passing down a tradition of card playing to my daughter that I can only hope continues into her teen years and is passed down to her children some day. I will share this story with my daughter as she ages, and hope that she, too, sees the magic behind our card game.