Making Tough Decisions
I tell you, I have a lot on my mind and have for about a…
I’m wondering if this is going to read like True Confessions; however, it is all true and it will show that bad boys can become good boys and men really only want the same things that women do.
I am 60-years-old and have been married for two years to Christine, my third wife. She is precious to me and I have a very strong love for her.
I met and married my college sweetheart in 1969, had our son in 1971 and was ‘happily’ married for almost twenty years. My profession is in retail and I manage sales people for a living. Along the way, women impress and flirt–and if you are a people person like I am–you sometimes flirt back. One thing leads to another and I was having a torrid affair that lasted several years prior to my wife discovering all of this. My wife and I split up; I became a new father once again and got married for the second time. It was a tough marriage from the first day. We stayed together for more than a dozen years, mostly for the sake of our daughter; however, about five years ago, it was over.
I found myself alone, and because of my wife’s behavior, I had custody of our daughter.
After a couple of years, my teenager and her brother said that I had to get a life, so I started looking.
My daughter has a horse, so I would end up meeting single gals at the stables. I dated on and off. Mostly off. I just could not find what I was looking for. I wanted to meet a ‘happy’ person. Someone who was attractive, sure, but my hot button was that she had to be happy to be herself. I have always thought of myself as a person who is happy and I am constantly trying to sell the ‘happy story’ to people, but I find that unless it is natural, it wears out.
I was determined to find a happy gal or I was prepared to go it alone. I became a member of Match.com and started dating. Most of the gals posted ‘glamour’ pictures. I hate those! Some lied about their age or where they lived. It was a nightmare.
Several were very nice and we had fun; however, no one was a match to what I was looking for.
Then, one evening, I was scanning the listings and Christine’s bio came up. She was attractive and talked about wanting to meet someone happy, etc. When I read it, it sounded like she was looking for me.
After several e-mails, we met for lunch and I was immediately impressed by her genuine smile and the positive things she talked about. Nothing negative came out of her mouth.
We started dating and I fell for her long before she fell for me. After a year, I asked her to marry me. I had told her all about my infidelity in the beginning and she did not let me off the hook. Lots of questions and soul searching on my part. I told her the truth and continue to work on our relationship. In the end, she said yes and I could not be happier.
I have found for myself that since I have failed at two marriages and have a desire to succeed at any cost, it has made me appreciate my wife all the more. She understands me and helps me through misunderstandings between us in a positive way, by explaining how she feels and why something is bothering her. I try to do the same, but I am not very good at it. I am, however, trying to understand how a woman’s mind works and will continue to keep an open mind on any relationship help I can get.
Thanks to Tony for sharing his part of the Christine & Tony love story! If you missed Christine’s Story please reference the post on site previous to this one.