Females Start Early: Drama & Jealousy

Growing up I was called all sorts of names and they are not names I will be sharing on here. I recall being put down so badly as a teen that I wanted to drink it all away. It seemed drinking was the only fun thing to do in this town and times haven’t changed either. With drinking comes experiences that you shouldn’t go through until you are an adult, getting hangovers, having sexual intercourse way too early in life and the idea that drinking is better than getting an education.

When you are a beautiful young lady in high school you are often deemed a bad girl and called names by other females. I was a very beautiful girl in high school and my family often assured me that the name calling stemmed from jealousy. Girls are real mean when you get into school, I am seeing girls starting to be mean even at a younger than high school age now. With a daughter who is soon to be eight years old I can’t believe the drama that goes on at such a young age.

Young girls are forced to see visions of skinny girls everywhere and start to question why they are bigger than others. My daughter started questioning her size at a very young age, let’s say it was about three years old. I am not joking! This girl at a young age realized that her friends were skinnier than her and when her fathers previous room mates daughter was at his home she would be found coming home feeling fat. This other little girl was a real tiny girl but her parents are real tiny both short and not a lot of meat on their bones, so it’s no wonder their child is like that.

I work every day to teach my children that we all have different body shapes and to be proud of some curves. Mama has curves and guess what? I have learned to love my curves, do I feel I could work out more to get to a healthier wet? Of course I do, but that’s just it, I am not thinking “oh I need to lose a ton of weight & look anorexic” I simply am teaching myself and my children that healthy weight is what you need to be. My daughter is beautiful, her belly sometimes grows out but she’s at those ages where she gets a bigger belly and then BAM all of a sudden the girl has grown a few inches taller. It’s about growing up and I am all set on my seven year old thinking she is not pretty enough, good enough or too fat.

There is a girl in school that was actually calling my daughter pregnant! Yes, at age seven this girl, who is my daughter’s friend, was telling Miss Ki that her belly looked pregnant. I can’t imagine, if I ever caught my daughter saying that to another girl regardless of whether she thought it was nice to say or not I would certainly be speaking with her. I have to constantly battle the words said between elementary level girls as a positive mother and reiterate to Miss Ki that she is gorgeous, beautiful and very smart. I have to tell her that sticks and stones may break my bones but words may never hurt me. That old saying has been around forever and I plan to utilize it many more times before my children hit the adult age of eighteen.

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10 Comments

  1. I’m thinking Sabreena is pretty level headed and not affected by all of the drama. So far so good!
    all we can do is build up their self esteem and tell them how wonderful they are and that the drama doesn’t get them anywhere in life.

  2. I am not looking forward to dealing with this with my daughter. I dealt with it for all my life and had/have very low self-esteem. It was very rough for me on the bus in high school. I made my mom drive me because the girls were so mean to me on the bus.
    .-= Paula Krueger´s last blog ..Taste Test Tuesday- Fast Eggs =-.

  3. Gabby doesn’t understand all this yet and is kept in a very small class but T has gone through it all and it is very sad. It makes them grow up so fast too. I try to watch what I say about my own looks and feelings to keep negative words out of their mouths.
    .-= MommaDJane´s last blog ..Don’t Fret The Sweat Campaign =-.

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