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Aggressive Behavior in Preschooler

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It’s so hard for me to deal with having an angry child, my middle son is much unlike the other two children, he is often very aggressive and easily angered.  I will be honest in that I am struggling with exactly how to work with a child that seems to be so full of anger and rage. I am partially wondering if maybe he is going to be diagnosed with a mood disorder when he gets older as that is very common in my family.  Since my son AJ is so full of anger so often it’s moments like the ones in the pictures in this post that I cherish most, when I see a smile on his face and he actually is affectionate.

Mother and Son

My little man AJ is the most comical, silly boy in the world to me, I love how much he can make me laugh with his silly conversations but when he is in one of his “moods” it’s so hard to remember what he’s like when he is happy. This boy has been angry since the day he was born, always a super grumpy baby who I only nursed for 8 weeks because he seemed to never be full enough off just my breast milk.  Born in August 2008 weighing in at 9lbs 5oz he was born a healthy, large boy. I fell in love with him when he was placed in my arms, I feel some days that maybe he is so angry because while he was in my tummy all I could think about was my own selfish reasons for not wanting nor being ready to have another child in my life full time, single and alone.

Mama and Son

Reality is I could blame myself all day long but AJ is the way he is because this is something unique to him, my other two children are super happy and pretty easy going just like me. The other two children don’t have aggressive behavior but sometimes they do act out after watching their brother have one of his outbursts. Somedays I feel like a mother who is physically abused, and it’s by my THREE year old son. I shouldn’t feel this way, I should be more firm and more assertive and really push the pediatrician to do something to assist in determining if AJ is acting out simply for attention reasons or if he truly has a medical or mental health issue. I don’t wish to watch as my son grows more angry everyday.

Lately I have been spending one on one time with him on the nights my daughter is with her Dad. I get to put Baby K to sleep in his crib and come out to the living room to play bouncy ball basketball, Wii Mario Kart or like last night we played matchbox cars together. I am hoping that every little moment I spend in a positive way with AJ will slowly work to help his aggressive behavior subside, otherwise I fear without medical help or professional advice he will only get worse. The one on one time seems to be helping a little bit, as well as being more consistent with time outs but he still is an aggressive child when angered. Maybe this is simply normal for a 3 year old boy, but I can’t see how this type of aggressive behavior is normal nor am I willing to accept it … I will some how seek advice & assistance in making sure my son learns that it’s okay to be mad but it’s never okay to hit another person.

Questions for thought: Do you have an angry child? Did you have to deal with such aggressive behavior? How did you handle it? What best works for your children who may be more aggressive in nature?

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4 Responses

  1. New Blog Post Aggressive Behavior in Preschooler http://bit.ly/9QFgZd

  2. Marilyn (A Lot of Loves) (10 comments)

    My 3.5 year old son has always been very intense. I wouldn’t say that he’s angry all the time – just overly passionate about everything. I find that the days where I spend all of my time with both of my kids equally are bad days for him. He really responds more positively if I spend a lot of one-on-one time with him. That’s not always easy but if you can manage it I think you might see some improvement. Good luck!
    .-= Marilyn (A Lot of Loves)´s last blog ..Swim Fishies Swim: Wednesday of Few Words =-.

    • brandyellen (365 comments)

      That is what I am finding has been working with my 3.5 year old son that seems to be aggressive. The one on one time only doing it for a short period of time has been starting to do wonders to his attitude, so much more positive lately! Thanks for your comment.

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